I probably should have posted this before, but I guess I didn’t really think about it until now.
I remember the first Christmas we had with our daughter. We went buck. We bought too many gifts and we were so excited for her to open everything. Beneath the tree was literally over flowing with gifts.
Then I saw a post on facebook about keeping the big gifts from the parents. Say that the smaller ones are from Santa.
Honestly, this is something that you never really think about unless your in the situation that it effects you. But I remember reading this and thinking about how fortunate I was.
Fortunately, I don’t remember a time where I went to school and had my friends talking about their gifts. I never felt like Santa forgot about me. I guess I was also lucky in that aspect. We always had lots of gifts under the tree growing up.
My kids won’t be the ones dreading being back at school for the first few days. They won’t be worrying about being asked what they got from Santa.
We have been trying to dial it back a little every year, but this year was the best so far. A big part of why we didn’t go overboard is because we recently moved to a smaller house. We have realized that we don’t have room for the toys that we already have. So every toy we bought this year had thought go into it whether we had the room to store it. So needless to say, I think we had a pretty modest christmas, but also a perfect one. We focused on games this year, something that the family could enjoy, and necessities for the stocking.
I really did like the idea of keeping the bigger gifts from the parents instead of santa. Even with that being said, I was planning on talking to my kids about not discussing Santas gifts.
My kids got small things, like pjs, soap, toothbrush, a toothbrush holder, a small toy, a kinder egg, and underwear in their stocking. Their present from santa was a colouring book/stamp set. This may not seem like alot to some people.
But there are kids who got less or none.
I don’t want my kids to go to school and “brag” about all the things they got from Santa or christmas in general. I don’t want there to be kids who feel “less important” because of what they got. Christmas isn’t supposed to be a comparison to who’s tv is bigger, who’s phone is faster, or who’s toy is more expensive. My daughter is already a very compassionate kid, so this has actually been a very easy conversation.
Just like our elf on the shelf, I have explained that we only talk about it with adult. With the elf, I said that there aren’t enough of them to be in every kids house. Rather then talk about it to all the kids at school, we kept it special just for us, as to not hurt kids feelings.
With our presents, I have told my daughter that she should pick ONE thing to talk about with the kids at school. Simply say that she got some other fun things, but this is her favorite. She picked the mini polly pocket she got in her stocking.
I explained that Santa brings different things for different kids. He pays attention to you throughout the year, and he only brings you what you need.
If he doesn’t bring you lots, its because he knows you don’t NEED it. If he brings you lots, then maybe he thinks that you DO need it. But every kid is different, and has different needs. Rather then focusing on the presents, I told her to talk about all the fun things we did.
She got to visit great grandparents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins.
She got to go skating.
She got to go Sledding and build a hill in our yard.
She got to have movie/pj days.
she played monopoly and other games, almost every day with us.
She got to eat WAAAAY more sugar then she normally does .
She got to spend time with her family.
And that is what should be talked about.
I think there should be more encouragement to talk about these things, rather then what the kids actually got under the tree.
I’m not sure what her teachers will ask on the first day. I know that memories, and being kind to other kids is at the top of my daughters list. One of the reasons that it is, is simply because I have talked to her about it.
She now understands that some kids don’t have toys, warm clothes, food, or even parents.
So I’m asking you all,
If you don’t want to save the big gifts to be from you, and you insist on telling your kids that they are from santa, that is your choice. But can you please do all the other parents a favour and tell your kids that it isn’t polite to talk about all the presents that they DID get.
Instead encourage them to talk about what they did ON their christmas vacation.
Focus on the memories, and not the things. Let’s try to raise a generation of compassionate people here 😊